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My struggle with letting go

enerflowhealing
Amelie St-Pierre

me letting go of the past Admission of truth : My struggle with letting go

Have I really been holding on to the past all this time? Thinking I had grieved, I had let go, and I had really changed my perception of what happened.

But in reality, I was still holding on to the last sliver of what had been.

This small object had followed me everywhere I had moved. It was always a bit tucked away but was sustaining the memory of a past I wanted to let go of, desperately.

Maybe it wouldn’t have had the same weight if I hadn’t feel guilty about the thought of removing it from my living room… from my life. Guilty for what? Guilty I might forget? Guilty for not honouring her? But could I really forget?

No… I don’t think so. What I want to remember are the good times, what was shared and the heart connection I felt. I don’t want to be reminded of what I loss.

And it’s exactly what her ashes do. A constant reminder of what is gone.

Honouring her is to honour the values, the opportunities and the love she gave me. I am not honouring her spirit by keeping a physical attachment and energy cording with what remains of her.

I never thought I would get has triggered as I did when my boyfriend pointed the ‘now’ obvious. Not only did I burst into tears, but my whole body felt weak. All good indicators of the negative effect it was having on me.

The pain I was carrying in my body was trying to tell me how much of a drain holding on to this past it was. It had been draining me for longer than is healthy.

I have been grieving for 12 years now. It’s time to let go. How long should one grieve for has no magic number. What is a healthy grieving process is not the same for everyone. But mine wasn’t healthy anymore.

I’m feeling it’s less a question of time frame than it is one of integrity.

I was living out of alignment.

I wasn’t living what I was asking people to do. I have been out of integrity without realizing it. I had ‘judge’ people for not letting go, when they were mirroring my own reality.

I had been blind to the multiple signs and had numbed my own emotional guidance.

It’s no coincidence I had been asking the Universe to show me where I was out of alignment… That same day I received my answer.

I am now ready to fully let go and to release my mom’s ashes where they belong. To release the story and the pain.

My question for you is : Is there an area in your life you think you have let go, but in reality haven’t completely release the reins?

About the author

Amelie help people release untreated emotions and negative energies that constrict and restrict their ability to tap into their true potential. Combining her intuitive skills and her energy healing abilities she guides courageous soul through their personal struggles into personal empowerment.

Comments

  • Letting Go of Stuff - Liberate Your True Self 4 years, 2 months ago

    […] In the past few months I’ve been drawn to clean up and clear the clutter. I had done a lot when I moved in with my boyfriend last year, but was still holding on to things I thought I would sell, wear again, use for a special occasion, or just because I had spent money on those items (I was also holding on to what I really wanted to let go of). […]

  • Letting Go of Stuff - Liberate Your True Self 4 years, 2 months ago

    […] In the past few months I’ve been drawn to clean up and clear the clutter. I had done a lot when I moved in with my boyfriend last year, but was still holding on to things I thought I would sell, wear again, use for a special occasion, or just because I had spent money on those items (I was also holding on to what I really wanted to let go of). […]

  • AnnaLaura Brown 4 years, 2 months ago

    This is such good advice. I've been working on truly forgiving myself and moving forward after losing my job in April and its hard but I know I can do it.

  • AnnaLaura Brown 4 years, 2 months ago

    This is such good advice. I've been working on truly forgiving myself and moving forward after losing my job in April and its hard but I know I can do it.

  • Sarah Arrow 4 years, 2 months ago

    Ah Amelia, what a touching post. Like you I'd want to hang on and not let go.I'm not sure even after a period of reflection would I want to release the emotions - how unhealthy is that!

  • Sarah Arrow 4 years, 2 months ago

    Ah Amelia, what a touching post. Like you I'd want to hang on and not let go.I'm not sure even after a period of reflection would I want to release the emotions - how unhealthy is that!

  • Nancy Seeger 4 years, 2 months ago

    Great advice - I have been struggling to let go and walk into who I wanted to be, but I am on that path and have all ready taken new steps in 2014. I look forward to your next post.

  • Nancy Seeger 4 years, 2 months ago

    Great advice - I have been struggling to let go and walk into who I wanted to be, but I am on that path and have all ready taken new steps in 2014. I look forward to your next post.

  • Leanne Chesser 4 years, 2 months ago

    Yes, there's an area that I need to do some more work on. It has come to light a couple of times recently and it's time to let it go.

  • Leanne Chesser 4 years, 2 months ago

    Yes, there's an area that I need to do some more work on. It has come to light a couple of times recently and it's time to let it go.

  • Renae 4 years, 2 months ago

    Releasing and letting go -- this came up for me a couple of nights ago and slapped me across the face. Okay, time to face the dragon and conquer it once again.

  • Renae 4 years, 2 months ago

    Releasing and letting go -- this came up for me a couple of nights ago and slapped me across the face. Okay, time to face the dragon and conquer it once again.

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